Mood Swing in the Swing Dance Festival

Swing music plays outside, the big band
is muffled from the bathroom stall, my hand
shakes; off-beat with the rhythm and erratic
like a struggling plane about to crash land

My breath is not on tempo, please follow the beat
of the bassline, stabilize my lungs, fight the heat
of the encroaching walls that never move, survive
until the next refrain, until the chorus and lyrics repeat

Hours ago: a lesson in musicality, the structure of jazz
AABA, the first two bars so similar, then one with contrast
Then a final repeat to bring it home, the pattern complete
AABA, the swing music plays on till the end of the class

Now there are hundreds on the dance floor, spinning and twirling
but I'm here, on the toilet, my stomach is churning and swirling
Nothing will come out, it's not in the gut, it's in the head, but alas
My body should be moving but mentally my head is unfurling

I want to dance, I want to dance but right now I want to die
I want to live, I want to laugh, I want to feel, I want to cry
Follow the beat, survive till the refrain, this verse will go away soon
The pattern goes on, keep on dancing and don't ask why